The official audit

The results are official:

The card sharps, layabouts and miscreants at the Edgemere Casino bilked, cheated and otherwise unfairly deprived me of $5.15 of hard earned cash last night. If it weren’t for the $6.28 in goodies I consumed, “comped”, I would consider seeking a federal investigation.

The bloodthirsty bastards are going to see an inspirational film today: Sweeney Todd. No meat pie for me, thanks.