Gee, folks, I’d just absolutely LOVE to write something pithy and insightful about President Bush’s address to the nation about Iraq, but I didn’t see it and I just can’t.

Besides, I’m too distracted with worry right now about the really big issue facing America:  Will Rosie and The Donald ever make up?

Donald attempted a surge by putting it in writing and sending Rosie a letter.  I’m not sure he anticipated that this would be met with Barbara Walters denying part of The Donald’s statements.

Then, Barbara called him a poor, pathetic man.

And got a high five from Rosie.

In the whole show, they never said his name.

Now, he’s being all snarky about Barbara, saying it was sad to see her reading her statement off a cue card.

And, somehow lost in all this is the fate of that poor girl who was supposed to be a pageant queen and then got drunk and rowdy like 20 year old girls are never supposed to be like and then Donald, who owns the pageant, let her off the hook.  So, where’s she now?  Rehab, maybe?

See how hard it is to keep up with all the details of this story?  And, who will solve this mess?  I propose that we bomb a bridge.  Isn’t that where “trump” is a real word, the card game “bridge”?  It’s the center stage of the Global War on Celebrity Bitchslaps.  Hey, it worked for W!

Or, better yet, we can get some gay person, the bipolars or whatever they are, and they could go out on an Elimidate with Donald, Rosie and Barbara.  Except Rosie is already gay, so I don’t know how that will all work out.  But, they could go out to a park and then on an activity and then dancing in a bar and the bipolar person could Elimidate two of them and then we’d know who won and all.

Wouldn’t that be cool?