I indulged myself last week and bought a crock pot.  I haven’t had one for some time.

So, I went to the store and bought some meat and put it in the new crock pot with two potatoes, a slew of them li’l carrots and a medium sized red onion.   Slathered some Woo-chester-shire sauce and some cajun seasons over the top and let ‘er rip.

Nuthin’ fancy.

Well, I’m as proud of this baby as if I’d invented sliced bread.  YUM.

Trouble is, I’m eating alone.

I hate that.

I grew up with a family and had a family of my own and eating has always been a communal ritual as much as nourishment for the body for me. 

A meal alone, well, it just doesn’t measure up to the crackle of conversation around a table.

Myself, I toasted up some sourdough bread and let that meat fall all over it and mashed up the taters and poured the simmmerin’ sauce over the taters and had about a tablespoon of the little carrots kinda off to themselves so the juices don’t mix any more than they already have for six or so hours.

Made me think of my children having to endure my plain cooking for the years I was a stay at home dad.  It’s funny to think of the times I fried potatoes with onions for teenagers in those years.  I miss those times.  I was in law school.  Life was pretty good.

I can make marinara sauce not out of a bottle and boil that pasta al dente.

Since it’s just me, though, I don’t feel like going to all the trouble of cleaning up after myself and after cutting up the credit cards, I can’t afford to go out to eat as much as I once did.  Lately, I’ve eaten a lot of meals standing over the kitchen sink.  Too many of those “meals” consisted of something on a saltine cracker.

Some of you know that every once in a while, I’ll haul off and make beans and ham with cornbread, spring onions and sweet ice tea.  Yeah, bay-bee.

which brings me back to the crock pot.  I figure this way, I can have a decent meal for a couple of days and not have to be a stay at home schmuck. 

And, that’s all to the good.

But, I miss having someone to share it with.

I also make a pretty good second chef in a kitchen when a big meal is being prepared because I like to chop vegetables and such and can put together a helluva elaborate “farmer’s” salad.  I also don’t mind being the one who tidies up as we cook and go along so that there’s always open counter space.  I even like going to search in the pantry for the spices and will, if suitably enticed, stir.

I’m not all that fond of things that must be stirred while heated, especially if opaque.  They scare me.  I’ve never really been able to force myself to burn the flour to make a good rue.

Once upon a time, I did a lot of hamburger cooking, but it seems I don’t do that at all anymore.  Wonder why that is?

Maybe this summer I’ll make everyone come over to my mom’s pool and I’ll cook burgers from dusk to dawn.  Eh. Maybe not.

Tonight, as I finish my amazing home made meal at my lonely table, jazz is on the music box in the living room and Sinatra is quiet, having been treated by a time outside since it was such a fine day.

It’s my sister’s birthday!  Happy birthday, left coast sister!

I took off today since it was so pretty.  Drove out to Hefner and stood on the North edge of the dam.  Took the top down on the Mid Life Chrysler.  Listened to Van Morrison.

I hate these full moons!